How to Hook Up With an Attractive Woman

If you are a man who has never had much luck when it comes to hooking up with an attractive woman then you are in luck because there is an answer for you. Join an internet dating site. Yes, believe it or not, there are many attractive women using online dating sites these days. And the great thing about that for a man like yourself who may lack some confidence is that you can win over these attractive women with your personality. If a woman falls for your personality before meeting you, then they are more likely to find you attractive physically as well.

There are different types of internet dating sites for different types of needs and you will find different types of women on these different sites! Roughly put there are sites for "meaningless" dating and sites for "serious" dating. I think you know which kind you are interested in. If you've had enough of "one night stands" and you are looking for something permanent and long lasting (perhaps even marriage) then obviously you want a "serious" dating site. But if you are really more interested in just "having fun" then of course the "meaningless" dating site is for you.

You may not think that you have the looks or the money to pull off hooking up with a beautiful really attractive woman but I think you will be surprised by what you can do in the world of online dating. It's a "whole new world" out there and it's definitely time to check it out.

Why the Kamikaze Approach Draws in and Attracts Women

WARNING: This technique is not for everyone. However, if you think you have what it takes to go this route, by all means, read on.

When I talk about 'going kamikaze' I'm talking about the ultimate way to approach and attract women. Just so that you know what you're getting into here, you will be rejected by some women. Now that you know that, if you still believe that you can do this, here's the plan.

There is no plan.

No watching a woman. No checking out her body language. No across the room flirting. No prep time.

You see a woman you like, you go up to her, and start talking. Sure, some women will reject you, but a lot more will be immediately attracted to you.

Here's the reasons why this approach works:

You refuse to give in to the fear of rejection; this builds confidence. Confidence is king when it comes to meeting women. They are drawn to a confident man like a moth is driven to the flame. Confidence is simply one of the most attractive characteristics a man can possess.

You quit thinking about failure and have a winning attitude. When failure isn't an obstacle, but merely a turn in the path, you instinctively know that there's another girl just around the corner. Your attitude remains positive and easygoing.

Your time is spent in talking to more women each night instead of studying them. You can spend anywhere from half an hour to half the night watching one woman before you make any kind of a move. Going kamikaze uses that time to meet women instead of watching them. A much better use of time.

Going kamikaze is definitely not for the faint of heart. But, if you're tired of spending hours and hours of your precious dating time planning and watching, this may be the answer you've been looking for.

Nice Guys Don't Always Finish Last

It's a question which has puzzled many people - what do girls look for in a guy? The shortest answer is someone 'nice'. Having a flash car, dressing in designer gear and being super smooth in conversations don't always guarantee getting the girl. Neither does being a bad boy with dodgy friends and a criminal record. All girls want in a guy is someone who'll treat them nicely. So if you're a nice guy and are fed up of finishing last, then it doesn't have to be that way anymore.

Don't be shy

Conversation can really make or break a date for a girl. Women like to talk. They tend to be curious and like to find out as much information as possible about the guys they date. You will be asked questions on your date so make sure you have the confidence to answer them in an interesting and honest way. Short 'yes' and 'no' answers will make for a very dull and awkward date. Also remember to ask about her and what she likes to do, girls appreciate a man who does this as it shows that they care.

Love yourself

No one likes a show off but displaying confidence in yourself can keep girls interested. Paying attention to detail to your appearance will show a girl that you like her enough to make an effort for the date. Not caring about what other people think of you is a hard trick to pull off but if you can master it then you'll be a hit with the girls. All girls like to feel special and they certainly will if you show confidence and coolness and choose them to go on a date with.

Don't be a push over

Most girls find confident guys attractive. Make sure you don't look shocked or surprised if she asks to see you again and don't drone on about how lucky you are to have gone on a date with her. Like guys, girls like to do a little bit of chasing too so don't make yourself too available or confess your love after just one date. While following the phrase 'treat them mean to keep them keen' might be going a bit far, you can let a girl know you like her without saying it outright and potentially coming across as desperate.

Be funny

This doesn't mean throwing out Little Britain catchphrases every other sentence or making fun of other people for a cheap joke. Having a good sense of humour can simply mean being able to laugh at yourself and not taking life to seriously. Forced and awkward conversation is probably the key to not getting a second date but by relaxing and being yourself you'll probably find that comedy comes easily and you'll have your date in stitches.

Act your age

Unless you're 15 and trying to impress someone in your school then pulling wheelies on a BMX or asking a girl to watch your latest goal on a football game will not impress. Girls look for fun, excitement and conversation on first dates so sitting around playing computer games or taking her on a pub crawl with your mates are best avoided. Be creative when you're planning a date and suggest unusual places to go such as a local museum or gardens, an old film screening or a walk in the country. This will show thoughtfulness and maturity.

Nice guys don't always finish last and with these tips and by simply being yourself, you can win first place with the girls.

Recovering From Being a "Nice" Guy

You have listened to her complain about the jerk who treated her badly countless times only to watch her go out with him again and again. All of your selfless acts fall to the wayside only to hear about her mistreatment the following week.

You are left in pit of despair and confusing as the mantra "nice guy's finish last" repeats in your head. "When will she wake up? When will she realize that there is a nice guy who will treat her the way she deserves to be treated sitting right here?"

She will never realize this because you aren't in fact a nice guy. Appearances can be deceiving and the "nice guy" act is one of the biggest deceptions around.

On the surface, nice guys appear to be selfless, kind, caring human beings but this is far from the truth. Beneath their generous acts and humble words lurks something darker. A dark side few nice guys care to admit because nice guys aren't really that nice.

Here is a paraphrase from the book "No More Mr. Nice Guy" :

Nice Guys avoid conflict.

Nice Guys hold contempt for women.

Nice Guys have difficulty making their needs a priority.

Nice Guys lack conviction in their opinions or beliefs. Typically they will wait and see what the popular opinion is before taking a stand. If a rift happens in the group they will wait to see who is winning before taking a side.

Nice Guys lack loyalty. They develop a chameleon like type of behavior when interacting with others. If one member of a group doesn't like another the nice guy will take on the belief of whoever they around. One day they will talk badly of one member and the next they will reverse their opinion.

Nice Guys are dishonest. They hide their mistakes and say what they think people want to hear. They will say pretty much anything to gain the approval of others.

Nice Guys are secretive. They are so driven to seek approval that they will hide anything they believe might upset anyone.

Nice Guys are manipulative. They have hard time making their needs a priority and have difficulty asking for what they want clearly, so they feel powerless and result to manipulation.

Nice Guys are controlling, in order to keep their world smooth.

Nice Guys give to get and expect some kind of reciprocation.

Nice Guys are passive-aggressive.

Nice Guys are full of rage, a rage which tends to erupt at some of the most unexpected and seemingly inappropriate times.

Nice Guys have difficulty setting boundaries, and instead feel like victims.

Nice Guys are attracted to people and situations that need fixing.

Nice Guys are terrible listeners because they are too busy trying to figure out how to defend themselves or fix the other person's problem.

Nice Guys form relationships with partners who are "projects" or "diamonds in the rough."

And Nice Guys tend to swing back and forth between the nice side and the dark side.

Reframing Being a "Nice" Guy

If you have found yourself in any of these qualities odds are that you are a "nice" guy. While nice guys do have some redeeming qualities overall they lack mature emotional balance.

Their overall theme in life is one of seeking approval. They want everyone to like them because on a fundamental level they don't like themselves. They reach out for the approval of others because they aren't content with their own.

They want to be liked by everyone but the truth is that NO MATTER what you do NOT EVERYONE will like you. You can't please the entire crowd so it's not worth the effort. There are some people that will despise you because of your desire to be liked. You are playing a game that you can never win.

Every time you try to be a nice guy at the cost of your integrity or your honesty you are hurting yourself. It may be a small little lie or agreeing with something that you don't truly believe in but you are just making your situation worse.

Honesty, integrity and courage are at the core of confidence and high self esteem. Every time you sacrifice one of these principles you are chipping away at your self esteem. Do this long enough and there will be nothing left.

Recovering From Being "Nice" Guy

The first step is to become aware of your "nice" guy tendencies. Awareness is half the battle in conquering any issue. You can't fix something that you don't know is broken.

Be aware of every nice act that you preform and understand the real motivation behind it. Ask yourself "did I do this just to be nice or to be liked? Did I put the needs of others above my own just for their approval? Was my nice gesture genuine or was it done with the intention of getting something in return?"

On a some level you understand what your motivation behind every nice act is. You know that you are doing it for approval. Your mind re-enforces these "nice" acts in two ways:

1. Rationalizing your behavior

2. Judges others for not doing what you do

The most common rationalization for your behavior that your mind will create is "I'm just trying to be nice." Every lie, manipulation and bending over backwards for people will be rationalized by this thought.

A nice guy judges others for not being a nice as him. A martyr has a load of resentment towards people who don't do the things that he does. They create an arrogance and draw part of their self esteem from having a better than you type of attitude.

If you look deeper into this judgment you will find jealousy. They are jealous of the people who have boundaries, aren't self sacrificing for others and can get what they desire. They wish they could do the same but would run the risk of losing the validation they so desperately crave.

If you look at how much a nice guy judges a jerk you will see mass amounts of jealousy. He judges him for the way he treats the girl but in reality he wishes he could have her. He can't be with her so he resorts to bitterness and taking a holier than thou route.

The second step is to drop this habit. This step can be very difficult because some of you have been a practicing "nice" guy behaviors for most of your life. The external validation that you receive from others can become very addicting. Here are some ways you can put an end to this "nice" guy act:

-Start saying no to people. Write out a list of things that you do simply because you want to be liked and stop doing them. You should end up saying to no to people far more than you say yes.

It's not wrong to do for others but only if it's done on your own terms. Help people out but only if you truly want to and without the expectation of getting something in return.

-Get your priorities in line and never break them. The needs of others should come fourth on your list of priorities below your health, integrity and your mission.

-Make honesty and integrity a priority above being liked, it will help you sleep better at night. Become more open with your opinion and more upfront with people.

-Learn to draw your self esteem and approval from within. Being liked by others isn't a bad thing but it becomes one when it's your only means of feeling good about yourself.

-Develop a spine and start to stand up for yourself. It's impossible to truly love yourself and draw self esteem from within if you are letting people walk all over you. Every time you let someone treat you badly your self esteem drops just a little bit more.

-Adopt the frame of "hey, I'm not for everyone." Get used to the fact that whatever you do not everyone is going to like you. It's ironic that once you let go of trying to get people to love you the more love you will draw into your life.

-"I trust the universe to supply my abundance and prosperity" That nagging voice in the back of your head will be right when it tells you that being more authentic and honest will cause most of your "friends" to go bye bye. They will be upset over losing their doormat and nice guy friend who will do anything for them.Get over it and trust the universe to supply you with friends.

There will be a transition period were you will you lose a good bit of your friends. By weathering the grace period you will allow better and more genuine friends to come into your life. You will be filled with more abundance than you can handle.

You will be taking a large risk by dropping the "nice" guy act. It may feel safer to keep things just the way they are. If you are satisfied with the fact that the only time a woman gets wet around you is when she is crying on your shoulder then I suggest that you continue on that path. But if you aren't happy with your life or your success with women then I think it's time for a change.

How to Get Back With My Ex Girlfriend - 5 Things That NEED to Happen!

"Hmmm . . . how to get back with my ex girlfriend?" is the recurring question in your mind. I can just see you now, sitting there with one arm tucked in your armpit, your other arm resting on it, with your index finger on your temple . . . or are you stroking your chin with your first finger and thumb?

This is a very sensitive subject and circumstance. But I gather that you believe you can have her back-after all . . . you're asking HOW to, not CAN you get her back. If you honestly want her back, then pay close attention to what I'm about to say.

I'm going to give you 5 surefire ways to begin rebuilding the foundation of what you hope to be a satisfying relationship. If you do everything in your power to really follow them, the result will be: her taking another look at what she might be missing!

#1. Forgiveness- The first thing that needs to happen is forgiveness. You need to ask her to forgive you, whether or not breaking up was your fault. Asking for forgiveness for previous transgressions during the relationship speaks of "owning up to" your part-it always takes two! You could say something like, "Ya know . . . I'm really sorry I took you for granted; I can see it now; could you ever forgive me?"

Also, you need to forgive her, whether or not breaking up was her fault. It's not necessary to tell her you forgive her, as a matter of fact, it's best that you don't. This should be done within your own heart. Truly, let bygones be bygones. Forgive her for the same small offenses that dwelt in you-nobody's perfect-we all do things . . . even when we're not conscious of them. Forgiveness for even the smallest things is what gives a relationship new foundation.

#2. Acknowledgment-Of course if you did something to cause the separation, it should go without saying that you should apologize, but you can't apologize sincerely without acknowledging that you messed up. This involves dropping your pride: don't pretend that your screw-up wasn't a big deal just so you don't have to feel any guilt. What if the tables were turned? Would it go over well with you if she said, "I don't understand why you're so upset; I told you it didn't mean anything!" Extreme I know, but whatever it was you did, I hope you get the point.

If you have no idea of why your ex girlfriend broke up with you, it doesn't hurt to ask. You probably do know why, but were too busy denying her claims that you missed the signs of relationship demise. Ask her why now, and you'll more than likely actually hear her-acknowledge what she says as being valid and express your regrets.

#3. Maturity- is a must if you're asking, "How to get back with my ex girlfriend?" No matter what things went on during the relationship or during the break-up, you've got to be able to show that you can behave as an adult and not a child who throws tantrums trying to get what they want. A woman needs to feel secure where her heart and life are concerned--children don't provide security!

When you're with your ex, hold down the cussing, fighting, tantrums, and begging-those things only prove your weak-mindedness to her. You've got to show her that you can stand on your own two feet without her-if you've got solid footing, then you serve as a strong foundation on which she can also stand, allowing her to recognize the stability and security you might provide if she takes you back..

#4. Friendship-There's nothing more important to building a relationship than a good friendship. Remember . . . you want to start over, so you need to become her friend all over again (or for the first time; I understand a lot of relationships began in the bedroom). A lasting bond starts with being real friends. You should be able to talk seriously and not so seriously, laugh together and cry together, share secrets, fears and vulnerabilities, and have each other's backs.

All of these things build trust-not just in the area of fidelity, but also in the other issues of life. She should be able to count on you for even the smallest of things like . . . knowing when she needs encouragement . . . or even a back rub.

#5. T.A.L.T.-"Try A Little Tenderness" This last tip is better said by quoting the words sang by Otis Redding: "She may be waiting-anticipating . . . things she might never, ever possess. But while she's there waiting, try a little tenderness. You won't regret it-no . . . young girls-they don't forget it . . . love is their own happiness. It's all so easy, all you got to do is 'try a little tenderness!'"

Don't forget, if you take these steps without coming off desperate, and if the love you shared was really "shared," and not just one-way, she will definitely take notice, and after a while, she may even admit that it was a huge mistake you broke up. I'm not promising that she'll fall into your arms, but this is a realistic process which was laid out in T Dub' Jackson's book, "The Magic of Making Up".

I'm pullin' for you!