Russian Brides

четверг, 5 ноября 2009 г.

What She Wants From You And How to Satisfy Her Every Need


Are girls sometimes too complicated to wrap your head around? Do you wish there was a cheat sheet to figuring them out? Do you wish there was an easier way? Here's a tip: that girl that you really like probably has her perfect guy all planned out in her head already,  but chances are the guy they end up with won't be anything like him. Is this confusing you?

Don't worry; there are plenty of guys out there in the same position as you. What you need to remember is that emotionally connecting to a woman is the key. If you can find out what she's thinking and work out how she feels in response to what you say, you'll be that much closer to making her yours.

A woman won't be blown over by your looks alone, and chances are, a really good-looking guy will strike out with a girl that you could still have a chance with. The thing to remember here is their emotions. Pay attention to female emotional needs and you'll be able to get the girl of your dreams.

What Girls Really Want from Guys - 3 Simple Steps to Give Them What They Need

1. Women want a guy to connect with them emotionally. Keeping yourself in touch with their emotions and knowing their emotional state will help you to keep them interested. Make sure you know what keeps her happy and then file that information away for future use when you need it.

2. Show some love. Physical contact cannot ever go wrong. Don't be grabby or demanding, but give her some gentle touching; holding hands will go a long way. Physical affection is an important part of a relationship and showing that you can handle it early on will help her see how much you really like her.

3. Let her love you. Now that things are going your way, it would seem like she's all yours. It's time to test that out. Try backing off  and seeing how she reacts to it. If she immediately starts chasing you, she's hooked on you and if you want, you can use a form of hypnosis-like seduction to help make that bond even stronger.

The form of hypnosis is called "fractionation," and proper use of it will turn you into her superman forever by connecting her emotionally to you. It's really powerful, and is said to be able to make women fall in love super quickly - in 15 minutes or even less. Amazingly powerful - although highly controversial.

What She Wants From You And How to Satisfy Her Every Need


Are girls sometimes too complicated to wrap your head around? Do you wish there was a cheat sheet to figuring them out? Do you wish there was an easier way? Here's a tip: that girl that you really like probably has her perfect guy all planned out in her head already,  but chances are the guy they end up with won't be anything like him. Is this confusing you?

Don't worry; there are plenty of guys out there in the same position as you. What you need to remember is that emotionally connecting to a woman is the key. If you can find out what she's thinking and work out how she feels in response to what you say, you'll be that much closer to making her yours.

A woman won't be blown over by your looks alone, and chances are, a really good-looking guy will strike out with a girl that you could still have a chance with. The thing to remember here is their emotions. Pay attention to female emotional needs and you'll be able to get the girl of your dreams.

What Girls Really Want from Guys - 3 Simple Steps to Give Them What They Need

1. Women want a guy to connect with them emotionally. Keeping yourself in touch with their emotions and knowing their emotional state will help you to keep them interested. Make sure you know what keeps her happy and then file that information away for future use when you need it.

2. Show some love. Physical contact cannot ever go wrong. Don't be grabby or demanding, but give her some gentle touching; holding hands will go a long way. Physical affection is an important part of a relationship and showing that you can handle it early on will help her see how much you really like her.

3. Let her love you. Now that things are going your way, it would seem like she's all yours. It's time to test that out. Try backing off  and seeing how she reacts to it. If she immediately starts chasing you, she's hooked on you and if you want, you can use a form of hypnosis-like seduction to help make that bond even stronger.

The form of hypnosis is called "fractionation," and proper use of it will turn you into her superman forever by connecting her emotionally to you. It's really powerful, and is said to be able to make women fall in love super quickly - in 15 minutes or even less. Amazingly powerful - although highly controversial.

What She Wants From You And How to Satisfy Her Every Need


Are girls sometimes too complicated to wrap your head around? Do you wish there was a cheat sheet to figuring them out? Do you wish there was an easier way? Here's a tip: that girl that you really like probably has her perfect guy all planned out in her head already,  but chances are the guy they end up with won't be anything like him. Is this confusing you?

Don't worry; there are plenty of guys out there in the same position as you. What you need to remember is that emotionally connecting to a woman is the key. If you can find out what she's thinking and work out how she feels in response to what you say, you'll be that much closer to making her yours.

A woman won't be blown over by your looks alone, and chances are, a really good-looking guy will strike out with a girl that you could still have a chance with. The thing to remember here is their emotions. Pay attention to female emotional needs and you'll be able to get the girl of your dreams.

What Girls Really Want from Guys - 3 Simple Steps to Give Them What They Need

1. Women want a guy to connect with them emotionally. Keeping yourself in touch with their emotions and knowing their emotional state will help you to keep them interested. Make sure you know what keeps her happy and then file that information away for future use when you need it.

2. Show some love. Physical contact cannot ever go wrong. Don't be grabby or demanding, but give her some gentle touching; holding hands will go a long way. Physical affection is an important part of a relationship and showing that you can handle it early on will help her see how much you really like her.

3. Let her love you. Now that things are going your way, it would seem like she's all yours. It's time to test that out. Try backing off  and seeing how she reacts to it. If she immediately starts chasing you, she's hooked on you and if you want, you can use a form of hypnosis-like seduction to help make that bond even stronger.

The form of hypnosis is called "fractionation," and proper use of it will turn you into her superman forever by connecting her emotionally to you. It's really powerful, and is said to be able to make women fall in love super quickly - in 15 minutes or even less. Amazingly powerful - although highly controversial.

Older Single Men Dating Younger Single Women


There is a common trend that has been around for years and years in the dating scene. Many older single men want to date much younger attractive women. Some say it's completely natural for older single men to be drawn towards younger women. It's a biological pull, having something to do with fertility and the need to spread their seed. No matter what the cause, it's no less common now a days for older single men to chase after younger women than it was 100's of years ago. The difference lies in the fact that many younger women are not necessarily looking to date an older man. Nowadays, many women are self sufficient and are looking for someone to compliment their lives, not necessarily to look after them financially. Here are 5 important things that older single men should know in order to date a younger woman.

1. Looks do count

If you want to date a fit, attractive younger woman then ask yourself are you a fit, attractive older man?

Some people may say money is the number one thing you must have to attract a younger woman and that is the case in some circumstances but you still need to look good. Women want a man that takes pride in the way he looks and presents himself. Hit the gym, get a stylish hair cut and dress well. If you want to attract younger women, strive at being an attractive older man.

2. Don't be cheap and be chivalrous

A very common turn off for women is men who are cheap. Women still like chivalry and if you are willing to spend money on a them, it's a big turn on. Let's face it, if you want to date a younger attractive woman you have to use everything you have in your arsenal. Be gentlemen, open doors, carry her heavy bags and if you can treat a woman to an expensive dinner, or buy her things she can't afford herself, you both win, she gets pretty things and you get a pretty thing....her.

3. Don't "father" her

As an older single man you may have more "life experiences" than a younger single woman, however, you don't want to treat her like a child. If you nag at her or try and control her or belittle her, she will start to think of you as a father figure rather than a lover. If you want to date a younger single woman you will need to accept that she may be more naïve in some areas than you with less "life experiences " and her views may be more modern.

4. Be social

Younger attractive single women often have a busy social circle. If you keep an active social life as well, it shows you have good people skills and that people like you. It is also important that you get along with her friends; a woman's friends are very important and their opinions can often make or break your chances. Invite her to public functions, share your hobbies and interests and make her feel included in your personal life.

5. Have manners and be respectful

With money comes power and that can be an attraction for an attractive younger woman towards an older single man.

However, if you abuse that power by being rude to others, that can be a huge turn-off. Be respectful of her, ask her for her opinion, if you want a woman who is young, attractive and smart, you will have to show her that you respect her.

Next time you want to ask an attractive younger single woman out, be sure to reference this list first and it will lead you towards success.

Relationships: What You Already Know


I've been writing a relationship coaching/advice column since March. Now that over 200 reader questions have been asked, I wanted to share some of the common themes I've seen from Relationship Hell.

Before I do that though, I should acknowledge that it's really easy to give relationship advice a) when you have no emotional involvement in the issue and b) when you're not the one who has to act upon the advice. Despite the fact that I'm sitting in my comfy chair as I dole out opinions, feeling eternally grateful that I have the most drama-free husband in the world, I remember Relationship Hell like it was yesterday. I felt like I was always stressing over some guy who wanted too much commitment or who was afraid to commit. I'd over-analyze ambiguous comments and make myself physically sick with worry. I'd allow my mood to be influenced by his mood and base my own self-worth on others' opinions. And I remember the agony of realizing that you are more into them than they are you, or vice versa.

And I still do experience some of these things some of the time, but not like I used to. Partially because I've grown up a little since my 20s. But a lot of it is learning that my automatic reactions to events aren't necessarily true, they're just my story. I've learned that I can choose the interpretations and reactions I experience rather than just letting things happen to me, as if I was a helpless victim of the Relationship Game. Life is much more fun this way.

So here's a summary of the most common issues I've been seeing in the column. Maybe you'll find that one of these applies to your situation. Or maybe they'll all look eerily familiar as you remember them from your days in Relationship Hell.

You already know the answer

I've received questions on everything from a guy wondering if his girlfriend is a lesbian, to people wondering what to do on a good first date, to questions about whether soul mates exist. For the most part though, the people who write in with questions are worried about something; the crazy part is, they already know the answer.

If the guy you went out with two weeks ago hasn't called you back, deep down you know he isn't interested. But you may need a second opinion to help you get out of your own head. Your own "monkey mind" will take you in circles of justification and rationalization that drive you nuts, so you may want me-or anyone, for that matter-to weigh in and tell you what you already know. This is totally understandable. As obvious as the answer may be, I never think these questions are ridiculous because I really do get that our own mind can feel like the least reliable source in the world. I teach my clients ways to bypass the mind and tap into the knowing source you can trust, but those are often beyond the scope of my advice. At any rate, if she is still sleeping with her ex-boyfriend she is not a keeper. You know this. But write to me if you get confused and I'll kindly remind you.

Most of the time, you can be out of your misery if you are willing to communicate

I can't tell you how many times I've heard some variation of, "Do you think he thinks...?", or "Why would she do..."? The answer is always, "How should I know? Why don't you ask them?" Again, I get it-these aren't fun conversations to have. When you asked him if he wanted to stay over and he said no, you really want to know what he's thinking and you really, really don't want to ask him. So you ask me, as if I might know.

I don't think that every little thing in a relationship needs to be discussed. Ideally, we could all coach ourselves through the stories we're making up and we wouldn't need to have the other person explain themselves. But that isn't very realistic. Our minds don't like ambiguity and they definitely don't like gaps. So when we don't ask, we're often left filling in the blanks ourselves. And that can't be good. The truth is almost always easier to take than what we're making up.

Take it Easy-if it's this difficult, this probably just isn't the person for you

From my years in Relationship Hell, I remember that dating can really suck. When you want a committed relationship, the time and effort involved in first dates and getting to know someone new can feel torturous. But that's no reason to just "love the one you're with", especially if all the signs are telling you to run. If it's really difficult most of the time, this isn't the one for you. Relationships are not supposed to be so hard. I know we can all cite a million clichés that tell us otherwise, like "relationships are hard work". Yes, there are rough spots, but cheating, lying, verbal abuse (or worse) are not rough spots-they are signs to get the hell out. If you are 22 and your boyfriend has cheated on you for most of your relationship, he's not the one for you. If you're convinced that you need counseling after 4 months together, this may not be the one. It doesn't matter that you've met the parents or that your cat is already attached to him. Try to relax and trust that this is just practice for the good relationship that's on its way.

Older Single Men Dating Younger Single Women


There is a common trend that has been around for years and years in the dating scene. Many older single men want to date much younger attractive women. Some say it's completely natural for older single men to be drawn towards younger women. It's a biological pull, having something to do with fertility and the need to spread their seed. No matter what the cause, it's no less common now a days for older single men to chase after younger women than it was 100's of years ago. The difference lies in the fact that many younger women are not necessarily looking to date an older man. Nowadays, many women are self sufficient and are looking for someone to compliment their lives, not necessarily to look after them financially. Here are 5 important things that older single men should know in order to date a younger woman.

1. Looks do count

If you want to date a fit, attractive younger woman then ask yourself are you a fit, attractive older man?

Some people may say money is the number one thing you must have to attract a younger woman and that is the case in some circumstances but you still need to look good. Women want a man that takes pride in the way he looks and presents himself. Hit the gym, get a stylish hair cut and dress well. If you want to attract younger women, strive at being an attractive older man.

2. Don't be cheap and be chivalrous

A very common turn off for women is men who are cheap. Women still like chivalry and if you are willing to spend money on a them, it's a big turn on. Let's face it, if you want to date a younger attractive woman you have to use everything you have in your arsenal. Be gentlemen, open doors, carry her heavy bags and if you can treat a woman to an expensive dinner, or buy her things she can't afford herself, you both win, she gets pretty things and you get a pretty thing....her.

3. Don't "father" her

As an older single man you may have more "life experiences" than a younger single woman, however, you don't want to treat her like a child. If you nag at her or try and control her or belittle her, she will start to think of you as a father figure rather than a lover. If you want to date a younger single woman you will need to accept that she may be more naïve in some areas than you with less "life experiences " and her views may be more modern.

4. Be social

Younger attractive single women often have a busy social circle. If you keep an active social life as well, it shows you have good people skills and that people like you. It is also important that you get along with her friends; a woman's friends are very important and their opinions can often make or break your chances. Invite her to public functions, share your hobbies and interests and make her feel included in your personal life.

5. Have manners and be respectful

With money comes power and that can be an attraction for an attractive younger woman towards an older single man.

However, if you abuse that power by being rude to others, that can be a huge turn-off. Be respectful of her, ask her for her opinion, if you want a woman who is young, attractive and smart, you will have to show her that you respect her.

Next time you want to ask an attractive younger single woman out, be sure to reference this list first and it will lead you towards success.

Relationships: What You Already Know


I've been writing a relationship coaching/advice column since March. Now that over 200 reader questions have been asked, I wanted to share some of the common themes I've seen from Relationship Hell.

Before I do that though, I should acknowledge that it's really easy to give relationship advice a) when you have no emotional involvement in the issue and b) when you're not the one who has to act upon the advice. Despite the fact that I'm sitting in my comfy chair as I dole out opinions, feeling eternally grateful that I have the most drama-free husband in the world, I remember Relationship Hell like it was yesterday. I felt like I was always stressing over some guy who wanted too much commitment or who was afraid to commit. I'd over-analyze ambiguous comments and make myself physically sick with worry. I'd allow my mood to be influenced by his mood and base my own self-worth on others' opinions. And I remember the agony of realizing that you are more into them than they are you, or vice versa.

And I still do experience some of these things some of the time, but not like I used to. Partially because I've grown up a little since my 20s. But a lot of it is learning that my automatic reactions to events aren't necessarily true, they're just my story. I've learned that I can choose the interpretations and reactions I experience rather than just letting things happen to me, as if I was a helpless victim of the Relationship Game. Life is much more fun this way.

So here's a summary of the most common issues I've been seeing in the column. Maybe you'll find that one of these applies to your situation. Or maybe they'll all look eerily familiar as you remember them from your days in Relationship Hell.

You already know the answer

I've received questions on everything from a guy wondering if his girlfriend is a lesbian, to people wondering what to do on a good first date, to questions about whether soul mates exist. For the most part though, the people who write in with questions are worried about something; the crazy part is, they already know the answer.

If the guy you went out with two weeks ago hasn't called you back, deep down you know he isn't interested. But you may need a second opinion to help you get out of your own head. Your own "monkey mind" will take you in circles of justification and rationalization that drive you nuts, so you may want me-or anyone, for that matter-to weigh in and tell you what you already know. This is totally understandable. As obvious as the answer may be, I never think these questions are ridiculous because I really do get that our own mind can feel like the least reliable source in the world. I teach my clients ways to bypass the mind and tap into the knowing source you can trust, but those are often beyond the scope of my advice. At any rate, if she is still sleeping with her ex-boyfriend she is not a keeper. You know this. But write to me if you get confused and I'll kindly remind you.

Most of the time, you can be out of your misery if you are willing to communicate

I can't tell you how many times I've heard some variation of, "Do you think he thinks...?", or "Why would she do..."? The answer is always, "How should I know? Why don't you ask them?" Again, I get it-these aren't fun conversations to have. When you asked him if he wanted to stay over and he said no, you really want to know what he's thinking and you really, really don't want to ask him. So you ask me, as if I might know.

I don't think that every little thing in a relationship needs to be discussed. Ideally, we could all coach ourselves through the stories we're making up and we wouldn't need to have the other person explain themselves. But that isn't very realistic. Our minds don't like ambiguity and they definitely don't like gaps. So when we don't ask, we're often left filling in the blanks ourselves. And that can't be good. The truth is almost always easier to take than what we're making up.

Take it Easy-if it's this difficult, this probably just isn't the person for you

From my years in Relationship Hell, I remember that dating can really suck. When you want a committed relationship, the time and effort involved in first dates and getting to know someone new can feel torturous. But that's no reason to just "love the one you're with", especially if all the signs are telling you to run. If it's really difficult most of the time, this isn't the one for you. Relationships are not supposed to be so hard. I know we can all cite a million clichés that tell us otherwise, like "relationships are hard work". Yes, there are rough spots, but cheating, lying, verbal abuse (or worse) are not rough spots-they are signs to get the hell out. If you are 22 and your boyfriend has cheated on you for most of your relationship, he's not the one for you. If you're convinced that you need counseling after 4 months together, this may not be the one. It doesn't matter that you've met the parents or that your cat is already attached to him. Try to relax and trust that this is just practice for the good relationship that's on its way.

Older Single Men Dating Younger Single Women


There is a common trend that has been around for years and years in the dating scene. Many older single men want to date much younger attractive women. Some say it's completely natural for older single men to be drawn towards younger women. It's a biological pull, having something to do with fertility and the need to spread their seed. No matter what the cause, it's no less common now a days for older single men to chase after younger women than it was 100's of years ago. The difference lies in the fact that many younger women are not necessarily looking to date an older man. Nowadays, many women are self sufficient and are looking for someone to compliment their lives, not necessarily to look after them financially. Here are 5 important things that older single men should know in order to date a younger woman.

1. Looks do count

If you want to date a fit, attractive younger woman then ask yourself are you a fit, attractive older man?

Some people may say money is the number one thing you must have to attract a younger woman and that is the case in some circumstances but you still need to look good. Women want a man that takes pride in the way he looks and presents himself. Hit the gym, get a stylish hair cut and dress well. If you want to attract younger women, strive at being an attractive older man.

2. Don't be cheap and be chivalrous

A very common turn off for women is men who are cheap. Women still like chivalry and if you are willing to spend money on a them, it's a big turn on. Let's face it, if you want to date a younger attractive woman you have to use everything you have in your arsenal. Be gentlemen, open doors, carry her heavy bags and if you can treat a woman to an expensive dinner, or buy her things she can't afford herself, you both win, she gets pretty things and you get a pretty thing....her.

3. Don't "father" her

As an older single man you may have more "life experiences" than a younger single woman, however, you don't want to treat her like a child. If you nag at her or try and control her or belittle her, she will start to think of you as a father figure rather than a lover. If you want to date a younger single woman you will need to accept that she may be more naïve in some areas than you with less "life experiences " and her views may be more modern.

4. Be social

Younger attractive single women often have a busy social circle. If you keep an active social life as well, it shows you have good people skills and that people like you. It is also important that you get along with her friends; a woman's friends are very important and their opinions can often make or break your chances. Invite her to public functions, share your hobbies and interests and make her feel included in your personal life.

5. Have manners and be respectful

With money comes power and that can be an attraction for an attractive younger woman towards an older single man.

However, if you abuse that power by being rude to others, that can be a huge turn-off. Be respectful of her, ask her for her opinion, if you want a woman who is young, attractive and smart, you will have to show her that you respect her.

Next time you want to ask an attractive younger single woman out, be sure to reference this list first and it will lead you towards success.

Relationships: What You Already Know


I've been writing a relationship coaching/advice column since March. Now that over 200 reader questions have been asked, I wanted to share some of the common themes I've seen from Relationship Hell.

Before I do that though, I should acknowledge that it's really easy to give relationship advice a) when you have no emotional involvement in the issue and b) when you're not the one who has to act upon the advice. Despite the fact that I'm sitting in my comfy chair as I dole out opinions, feeling eternally grateful that I have the most drama-free husband in the world, I remember Relationship Hell like it was yesterday. I felt like I was always stressing over some guy who wanted too much commitment or who was afraid to commit. I'd over-analyze ambiguous comments and make myself physically sick with worry. I'd allow my mood to be influenced by his mood and base my own self-worth on others' opinions. And I remember the agony of realizing that you are more into them than they are you, or vice versa.

And I still do experience some of these things some of the time, but not like I used to. Partially because I've grown up a little since my 20s. But a lot of it is learning that my automatic reactions to events aren't necessarily true, they're just my story. I've learned that I can choose the interpretations and reactions I experience rather than just letting things happen to me, as if I was a helpless victim of the Relationship Game. Life is much more fun this way.

So here's a summary of the most common issues I've been seeing in the column. Maybe you'll find that one of these applies to your situation. Or maybe they'll all look eerily familiar as you remember them from your days in Relationship Hell.

You already know the answer

I've received questions on everything from a guy wondering if his girlfriend is a lesbian, to people wondering what to do on a good first date, to questions about whether soul mates exist. For the most part though, the people who write in with questions are worried about something; the crazy part is, they already know the answer.

If the guy you went out with two weeks ago hasn't called you back, deep down you know he isn't interested. But you may need a second opinion to help you get out of your own head. Your own "monkey mind" will take you in circles of justification and rationalization that drive you nuts, so you may want me-or anyone, for that matter-to weigh in and tell you what you already know. This is totally understandable. As obvious as the answer may be, I never think these questions are ridiculous because I really do get that our own mind can feel like the least reliable source in the world. I teach my clients ways to bypass the mind and tap into the knowing source you can trust, but those are often beyond the scope of my advice. At any rate, if she is still sleeping with her ex-boyfriend she is not a keeper. You know this. But write to me if you get confused and I'll kindly remind you.

Most of the time, you can be out of your misery if you are willing to communicate

I can't tell you how many times I've heard some variation of, "Do you think he thinks...?", or "Why would she do..."? The answer is always, "How should I know? Why don't you ask them?" Again, I get it-these aren't fun conversations to have. When you asked him if he wanted to stay over and he said no, you really want to know what he's thinking and you really, really don't want to ask him. So you ask me, as if I might know.

I don't think that every little thing in a relationship needs to be discussed. Ideally, we could all coach ourselves through the stories we're making up and we wouldn't need to have the other person explain themselves. But that isn't very realistic. Our minds don't like ambiguity and they definitely don't like gaps. So when we don't ask, we're often left filling in the blanks ourselves. And that can't be good. The truth is almost always easier to take than what we're making up.

Take it Easy-if it's this difficult, this probably just isn't the person for you

From my years in Relationship Hell, I remember that dating can really suck. When you want a committed relationship, the time and effort involved in first dates and getting to know someone new can feel torturous. But that's no reason to just "love the one you're with", especially if all the signs are telling you to run. If it's really difficult most of the time, this isn't the one for you. Relationships are not supposed to be so hard. I know we can all cite a million clichés that tell us otherwise, like "relationships are hard work". Yes, there are rough spots, but cheating, lying, verbal abuse (or worse) are not rough spots-they are signs to get the hell out. If you are 22 and your boyfriend has cheated on you for most of your relationship, he's not the one for you. If you're convinced that you need counseling after 4 months together, this may not be the one. It doesn't matter that you've met the parents or that your cat is already attached to him. Try to relax and trust that this is just practice for the good relationship that's on its way.

Older Single Men Dating Younger Single Women


There is a common trend that has been around for years and years in the dating scene. Many older single men want to date much younger attractive women. Some say it's completely natural for older single men to be drawn towards younger women. It's a biological pull, having something to do with fertility and the need to spread their seed. No matter what the cause, it's no less common now a days for older single men to chase after younger women than it was 100's of years ago. The difference lies in the fact that many younger women are not necessarily looking to date an older man. Nowadays, many women are self sufficient and are looking for someone to compliment their lives, not necessarily to look after them financially. Here are 5 important things that older single men should know in order to date a younger woman.

1. Looks do count

If you want to date a fit, attractive younger woman then ask yourself are you a fit, attractive older man?

Some people may say money is the number one thing you must have to attract a younger woman and that is the case in some circumstances but you still need to look good. Women want a man that takes pride in the way he looks and presents himself. Hit the gym, get a stylish hair cut and dress well. If you want to attract younger women, strive at being an attractive older man.

2. Don't be cheap and be chivalrous

A very common turn off for women is men who are cheap. Women still like chivalry and if you are willing to spend money on a them, it's a big turn on. Let's face it, if you want to date a younger attractive woman you have to use everything you have in your arsenal. Be gentlemen, open doors, carry her heavy bags and if you can treat a woman to an expensive dinner, or buy her things she can't afford herself, you both win, she gets pretty things and you get a pretty thing....her.

3. Don't "father" her

As an older single man you may have more "life experiences" than a younger single woman, however, you don't want to treat her like a child. If you nag at her or try and control her or belittle her, she will start to think of you as a father figure rather than a lover. If you want to date a younger single woman you will need to accept that she may be more naïve in some areas than you with less "life experiences " and her views may be more modern.

4. Be social

Younger attractive single women often have a busy social circle. If you keep an active social life as well, it shows you have good people skills and that people like you. It is also important that you get along with her friends; a woman's friends are very important and their opinions can often make or break your chances. Invite her to public functions, share your hobbies and interests and make her feel included in your personal life.

5. Have manners and be respectful

With money comes power and that can be an attraction for an attractive younger woman towards an older single man.

However, if you abuse that power by being rude to others, that can be a huge turn-off. Be respectful of her, ask her for her opinion, if you want a woman who is young, attractive and smart, you will have to show her that you respect her.

Next time you want to ask an attractive younger single woman out, be sure to reference this list first and it will lead you towards success.

Older Single Men Dating Younger Single Women


There is a common trend that has been around for years and years in the dating scene. Many older single men want to date much younger attractive women. Some say it's completely natural for older single men to be drawn towards younger women. It's a biological pull, having something to do with fertility and the need to spread their seed. No matter what the cause, it's no less common now a days for older single men to chase after younger women than it was 100's of years ago. The difference lies in the fact that many younger women are not necessarily looking to date an older man. Nowadays, many women are self sufficient and are looking for someone to compliment their lives, not necessarily to look after them financially. Here are 5 important things that older single men should know in order to date a younger woman.

1. Looks do count

If you want to date a fit, attractive younger woman then ask yourself are you a fit, attractive older man?

Some people may say money is the number one thing you must have to attract a younger woman and that is the case in some circumstances but you still need to look good. Women want a man that takes pride in the way he looks and presents himself. Hit the gym, get a stylish hair cut and dress well. If you want to attract younger women, strive at being an attractive older man.

2. Don't be cheap and be chivalrous

A very common turn off for women is men who are cheap. Women still like chivalry and if you are willing to spend money on a them, it's a big turn on. Let's face it, if you want to date a younger attractive woman you have to use everything you have in your arsenal. Be gentlemen, open doors, carry her heavy bags and if you can treat a woman to an expensive dinner, or buy her things she can't afford herself, you both win, she gets pretty things and you get a pretty thing....her.

3. Don't "father" her

As an older single man you may have more "life experiences" than a younger single woman, however, you don't want to treat her like a child. If you nag at her or try and control her or belittle her, she will start to think of you as a father figure rather than a lover. If you want to date a younger single woman you will need to accept that she may be more naïve in some areas than you with less "life experiences " and her views may be more modern.

4. Be social

Younger attractive single women often have a busy social circle. If you keep an active social life as well, it shows you have good people skills and that people like you. It is also important that you get along with her friends; a woman's friends are very important and their opinions can often make or break your chances. Invite her to public functions, share your hobbies and interests and make her feel included in your personal life.

5. Have manners and be respectful

With money comes power and that can be an attraction for an attractive younger woman towards an older single man.

However, if you abuse that power by being rude to others, that can be a huge turn-off. Be respectful of her, ask her for her opinion, if you want a woman who is young, attractive and smart, you will have to show her that you respect her.

Next time you want to ask an attractive younger single woman out, be sure to reference this list first and it will lead you towards success.

Older Single Men Dating Younger Single Women


There is a common trend that has been around for years and years in the dating scene. Many older single men want to date much younger attractive women. Some say it's completely natural for older single men to be drawn towards younger women. It's a biological pull, having something to do with fertility and the need to spread their seed. No matter what the cause, it's no less common now a days for older single men to chase after younger women than it was 100's of years ago. The difference lies in the fact that many younger women are not necessarily looking to date an older man. Nowadays, many women are self sufficient and are looking for someone to compliment their lives, not necessarily to look after them financially. Here are 5 important things that older single men should know in order to date a younger woman.

1. Looks do count

If you want to date a fit, attractive younger woman then ask yourself are you a fit, attractive older man?

Some people may say money is the number one thing you must have to attract a younger woman and that is the case in some circumstances but you still need to look good. Women want a man that takes pride in the way he looks and presents himself. Hit the gym, get a stylish hair cut and dress well. If you want to attract younger women, strive at being an attractive older man.

2. Don't be cheap and be chivalrous

A very common turn off for women is men who are cheap. Women still like chivalry and if you are willing to spend money on a them, it's a big turn on. Let's face it, if you want to date a younger attractive woman you have to use everything you have in your arsenal. Be gentlemen, open doors, carry her heavy bags and if you can treat a woman to an expensive dinner, or buy her things she can't afford herself, you both win, she gets pretty things and you get a pretty thing....her.

3. Don't "father" her

As an older single man you may have more "life experiences" than a younger single woman, however, you don't want to treat her like a child. If you nag at her or try and control her or belittle her, she will start to think of you as a father figure rather than a lover. If you want to date a younger single woman you will need to accept that she may be more naïve in some areas than you with less "life experiences " and her views may be more modern.

4. Be social

Younger attractive single women often have a busy social circle. If you keep an active social life as well, it shows you have good people skills and that people like you. It is also important that you get along with her friends; a woman's friends are very important and their opinions can often make or break your chances. Invite her to public functions, share your hobbies and interests and make her feel included in your personal life.

5. Have manners and be respectful

With money comes power and that can be an attraction for an attractive younger woman towards an older single man.

However, if you abuse that power by being rude to others, that can be a huge turn-off. Be respectful of her, ask her for her opinion, if you want a woman who is young, attractive and smart, you will have to show her that you respect her.

Next time you want to ask an attractive younger single woman out, be sure to reference this list first and it will lead you towards success.

Older Single Men Dating Younger Single Women


There is a common trend that has been around for years and years in the dating scene. Many older single men want to date much younger attractive women. Some say it's completely natural for older single men to be drawn towards younger women. It's a biological pull, having something to do with fertility and the need to spread their seed. No matter what the cause, it's no less common now a days for older single men to chase after younger women than it was 100's of years ago. The difference lies in the fact that many younger women are not necessarily looking to date an older man. Nowadays, many women are self sufficient and are looking for someone to compliment their lives, not necessarily to look after them financially. Here are 5 important things that older single men should know in order to date a younger woman.

1. Looks do count

If you want to date a fit, attractive younger woman then ask yourself are you a fit, attractive older man?

Some people may say money is the number one thing you must have to attract a younger woman and that is the case in some circumstances but you still need to look good. Women want a man that takes pride in the way he looks and presents himself. Hit the gym, get a stylish hair cut and dress well. If you want to attract younger women, strive at being an attractive older man.

2. Don't be cheap and be chivalrous

A very common turn off for women is men who are cheap. Women still like chivalry and if you are willing to spend money on a them, it's a big turn on. Let's face it, if you want to date a younger attractive woman you have to use everything you have in your arsenal. Be gentlemen, open doors, carry her heavy bags and if you can treat a woman to an expensive dinner, or buy her things she can't afford herself, you both win, she gets pretty things and you get a pretty thing....her.

3. Don't "father" her

As an older single man you may have more "life experiences" than a younger single woman, however, you don't want to treat her like a child. If you nag at her or try and control her or belittle her, she will start to think of you as a father figure rather than a lover. If you want to date a younger single woman you will need to accept that she may be more naïve in some areas than you with less "life experiences " and her views may be more modern.

4. Be social

Younger attractive single women often have a busy social circle. If you keep an active social life as well, it shows you have good people skills and that people like you. It is also important that you get along with her friends; a woman's friends are very important and their opinions can often make or break your chances. Invite her to public functions, share your hobbies and interests and make her feel included in your personal life.

5. Have manners and be respectful

With money comes power and that can be an attraction for an attractive younger woman towards an older single man.

However, if you abuse that power by being rude to others, that can be a huge turn-off. Be respectful of her, ask her for her opinion, if you want a woman who is young, attractive and smart, you will have to show her that you respect her.

Next time you want to ask an attractive younger single woman out, be sure to reference this list first and it will lead you towards success.

How to Avoid the Most Common Mistake Women Make When Dating a Man


Your friends tell you that you are a dreamer. You want to attract Mr. Right, your soul mate, the man of your dreams but keep on getting disappointed over and over again in relationships that are mediocre. You start to think, "well, maybe it is just time to settle down with the first best guy that comes around."

This is the biggest mistake you could ever make! Why settle for second best when you can have what your heart truly desires? Mr. Right! Yes, there is a perfect guy out there for you. You just have to believe in this fact!

This is what happens. You realize your relationships all have the same pattern. Everything starts out great but then something happens, you get into a fight but you eventually forgive him thinking, "it's OK. He will change." Your girlfriends say these exact words back to you so you start to believe it. But you know deep inside you are setting yourself up for failure. The relationship starts over only to end up exactly where it left off the last time. Your mom and your girlfriends all support you and offer a loving shoulder to cry on when the predictable bad cycle started again.

You might not realize it right now, but odds are that if you've had a run of "failed" relationships then you too have been guilty of both choosing the WRONG MAN and trying to fix a situation that could never be salvage in the first place.

Men don't change! Don't expect them to! Of course, he might decide he wants to grow and change FOR HIMSELF.

He will never grow and change FOR YOU! It usually takes a strong teacher or mentor for a man to be open to feedback and change.

I know what you are thinking! The little voice inside you is saying, "I will become his teacher!"

No! You will not. Your role in this relationship is to be the women he wants to love and cherish forever. He does not want you to be his teacher. He does not want you to be his mother telling him what to do or how to do it!

The moral of this story is don't try to fix someone you don't admire fully for who he is! If something is wrong from the beginning, get out QUICK! The longer you stay in the relationship, the more hurtful it will be to get out.

Wouldn't you rather find yourself in the arms of Mr. Right rather than crying on the shoulder of your girlfriend after a break up? Risk it. Go out there and look for YOUR Mr. Right.

Want to know more?

How to Avoid the Most Common Mistake Women Make When Dating a Man


Your friends tell you that you are a dreamer. You want to attract Mr. Right, your soul mate, the man of your dreams but keep on getting disappointed over and over again in relationships that are mediocre. You start to think, "well, maybe it is just time to settle down with the first best guy that comes around."

This is the biggest mistake you could ever make! Why settle for second best when you can have what your heart truly desires? Mr. Right! Yes, there is a perfect guy out there for you. You just have to believe in this fact!

This is what happens. You realize your relationships all have the same pattern. Everything starts out great but then something happens, you get into a fight but you eventually forgive him thinking, "it's OK. He will change." Your girlfriends say these exact words back to you so you start to believe it. But you know deep inside you are setting yourself up for failure. The relationship starts over only to end up exactly where it left off the last time. Your mom and your girlfriends all support you and offer a loving shoulder to cry on when the predictable bad cycle started again.

You might not realize it right now, but odds are that if you've had a run of "failed" relationships then you too have been guilty of both choosing the WRONG MAN and trying to fix a situation that could never be salvage in the first place.

Men don't change! Don't expect them to! Of course, he might decide he wants to grow and change FOR HIMSELF.

He will never grow and change FOR YOU! It usually takes a strong teacher or mentor for a man to be open to feedback and change.

I know what you are thinking! The little voice inside you is saying, "I will become his teacher!"

No! You will not. Your role in this relationship is to be the women he wants to love and cherish forever. He does not want you to be his teacher. He does not want you to be his mother telling him what to do or how to do it!

The moral of this story is don't try to fix someone you don't admire fully for who he is! If something is wrong from the beginning, get out QUICK! The longer you stay in the relationship, the more hurtful it will be to get out.

Wouldn't you rather find yourself in the arms of Mr. Right rather than crying on the shoulder of your girlfriend after a break up? Risk it. Go out there and look for YOUR Mr. Right.

Want to know more?

How to Avoid the Most Common Mistake Women Make When Dating a Man


Your friends tell you that you are a dreamer. You want to attract Mr. Right, your soul mate, the man of your dreams but keep on getting disappointed over and over again in relationships that are mediocre. You start to think, "well, maybe it is just time to settle down with the first best guy that comes around."

This is the biggest mistake you could ever make! Why settle for second best when you can have what your heart truly desires? Mr. Right! Yes, there is a perfect guy out there for you. You just have to believe in this fact!

This is what happens. You realize your relationships all have the same pattern. Everything starts out great but then something happens, you get into a fight but you eventually forgive him thinking, "it's OK. He will change." Your girlfriends say these exact words back to you so you start to believe it. But you know deep inside you are setting yourself up for failure. The relationship starts over only to end up exactly where it left off the last time. Your mom and your girlfriends all support you and offer a loving shoulder to cry on when the predictable bad cycle started again.

You might not realize it right now, but odds are that if you've had a run of "failed" relationships then you too have been guilty of both choosing the WRONG MAN and trying to fix a situation that could never be salvage in the first place.

Men don't change! Don't expect them to! Of course, he might decide he wants to grow and change FOR HIMSELF.

He will never grow and change FOR YOU! It usually takes a strong teacher or mentor for a man to be open to feedback and change.

I know what you are thinking! The little voice inside you is saying, "I will become his teacher!"

No! You will not. Your role in this relationship is to be the women he wants to love and cherish forever. He does not want you to be his teacher. He does not want you to be his mother telling him what to do or how to do it!

The moral of this story is don't try to fix someone you don't admire fully for who he is! If something is wrong from the beginning, get out QUICK! The longer you stay in the relationship, the more hurtful it will be to get out.

Wouldn't you rather find yourself in the arms of Mr. Right rather than crying on the shoulder of your girlfriend after a break up? Risk it. Go out there and look for YOUR Mr. Right.

Want to know more?

How to Avoid the Most Common Mistake Women Make When Dating a Man


Your friends tell you that you are a dreamer. You want to attract Mr. Right, your soul mate, the man of your dreams but keep on getting disappointed over and over again in relationships that are mediocre. You start to think, "well, maybe it is just time to settle down with the first best guy that comes around."

This is the biggest mistake you could ever make! Why settle for second best when you can have what your heart truly desires? Mr. Right! Yes, there is a perfect guy out there for you. You just have to believe in this fact!

This is what happens. You realize your relationships all have the same pattern. Everything starts out great but then something happens, you get into a fight but you eventually forgive him thinking, "it's OK. He will change." Your girlfriends say these exact words back to you so you start to believe it. But you know deep inside you are setting yourself up for failure. The relationship starts over only to end up exactly where it left off the last time. Your mom and your girlfriends all support you and offer a loving shoulder to cry on when the predictable bad cycle started again.

You might not realize it right now, but odds are that if you've had a run of "failed" relationships then you too have been guilty of both choosing the WRONG MAN and trying to fix a situation that could never be salvage in the first place.

Men don't change! Don't expect them to! Of course, he might decide he wants to grow and change FOR HIMSELF.

He will never grow and change FOR YOU! It usually takes a strong teacher or mentor for a man to be open to feedback and change.

I know what you are thinking! The little voice inside you is saying, "I will become his teacher!"

No! You will not. Your role in this relationship is to be the women he wants to love and cherish forever. He does not want you to be his teacher. He does not want you to be his mother telling him what to do or how to do it!

The moral of this story is don't try to fix someone you don't admire fully for who he is! If something is wrong from the beginning, get out QUICK! The longer you stay in the relationship, the more hurtful it will be to get out.

Wouldn't you rather find yourself in the arms of Mr. Right rather than crying on the shoulder of your girlfriend after a break up? Risk it. Go out there and look for YOUR Mr. Right.

Want to know more?

Relationships: What You Already Know


I've been writing a relationship coaching/advice column since March. Now that over 200 reader questions have been asked, I wanted to share some of the common themes I've seen from Relationship Hell.

Before I do that though, I should acknowledge that it's really easy to give relationship advice a) when you have no emotional involvement in the issue and b) when you're not the one who has to act upon the advice. Despite the fact that I'm sitting in my comfy chair as I dole out opinions, feeling eternally grateful that I have the most drama-free husband in the world, I remember Relationship Hell like it was yesterday. I felt like I was always stressing over some guy who wanted too much commitment or who was afraid to commit. I'd over-analyze ambiguous comments and make myself physically sick with worry. I'd allow my mood to be influenced by his mood and base my own self-worth on others' opinions. And I remember the agony of realizing that you are more into them than they are you, or vice versa.

And I still do experience some of these things some of the time, but not like I used to. Partially because I've grown up a little since my 20s. But a lot of it is learning that my automatic reactions to events aren't necessarily true, they're just my story. I've learned that I can choose the interpretations and reactions I experience rather than just letting things happen to me, as if I was a helpless victim of the Relationship Game. Life is much more fun this way.

So here's a summary of the most common issues I've been seeing in the column. Maybe you'll find that one of these applies to your situation. Or maybe they'll all look eerily familiar as you remember them from your days in Relationship Hell.

You already know the answer

I've received questions on everything from a guy wondering if his girlfriend is a lesbian, to people wondering what to do on a good first date, to questions about whether soul mates exist. For the most part though, the people who write in with questions are worried about something; the crazy part is, they already know the answer.

If the guy you went out with two weeks ago hasn't called you back, deep down you know he isn't interested. But you may need a second opinion to help you get out of your own head. Your own "monkey mind" will take you in circles of justification and rationalization that drive you nuts, so you may want me-or anyone, for that matter-to weigh in and tell you what you already know. This is totally understandable. As obvious as the answer may be, I never think these questions are ridiculous because I really do get that our own mind can feel like the least reliable source in the world. I teach my clients ways to bypass the mind and tap into the knowing source you can trust, but those are often beyond the scope of my advice. At any rate, if she is still sleeping with her ex-boyfriend she is not a keeper. You know this. But write to me if you get confused and I'll kindly remind you.

Most of the time, you can be out of your misery if you are willing to communicate

I can't tell you how many times I've heard some variation of, "Do you think he thinks...?", or "Why would she do..."? The answer is always, "How should I know? Why don't you ask them?" Again, I get it-these aren't fun conversations to have. When you asked him if he wanted to stay over and he said no, you really want to know what he's thinking and you really, really don't want to ask him. So you ask me, as if I might know.

I don't think that every little thing in a relationship needs to be discussed. Ideally, we could all coach ourselves through the stories we're making up and we wouldn't need to have the other person explain themselves. But that isn't very realistic. Our minds don't like ambiguity and they definitely don't like gaps. So when we don't ask, we're often left filling in the blanks ourselves. And that can't be good. The truth is almost always easier to take than what we're making up.

Take it Easy-if it's this difficult, this probably just isn't the person for you

From my years in Relationship Hell, I remember that dating can really suck. When you want a committed relationship, the time and effort involved in first dates and getting to know someone new can feel torturous. But that's no reason to just "love the one you're with", especially if all the signs are telling you to run. If it's really difficult most of the time, this isn't the one for you. Relationships are not supposed to be so hard. I know we can all cite a million clichés that tell us otherwise, like "relationships are hard work". Yes, there are rough spots, but cheating, lying, verbal abuse (or worse) are not rough spots-they are signs to get the hell out. If you are 22 and your boyfriend has cheated on you for most of your relationship, he's not the one for you. If you're convinced that you need counseling after 4 months together, this may not be the one. It doesn't matter that you've met the parents or that your cat is already attached to him. Try to relax and trust that this is just practice for the good relationship that's on its way.

How to Avoid the Most Common Mistake Women Make When Dating a Man


Your friends tell you that you are a dreamer. You want to attract Mr. Right, your soul mate, the man of your dreams but keep on getting disappointed over and over again in relationships that are mediocre. You start to think, "well, maybe it is just time to settle down with the first best guy that comes around."

This is the biggest mistake you could ever make! Why settle for second best when you can have what your heart truly desires? Mr. Right! Yes, there is a perfect guy out there for you. You just have to believe in this fact!

This is what happens. You realize your relationships all have the same pattern. Everything starts out great but then something happens, you get into a fight but you eventually forgive him thinking, "it's OK. He will change." Your girlfriends say these exact words back to you so you start to believe it. But you know deep inside you are setting yourself up for failure. The relationship starts over only to end up exactly where it left off the last time. Your mom and your girlfriends all support you and offer a loving shoulder to cry on when the predictable bad cycle started again.

You might not realize it right now, but odds are that if you've had a run of "failed" relationships then you too have been guilty of both choosing the WRONG MAN and trying to fix a situation that could never be salvage in the first place.

Men don't change! Don't expect them to! Of course, he might decide he wants to grow and change FOR HIMSELF.

He will never grow and change FOR YOU! It usually takes a strong teacher or mentor for a man to be open to feedback and change.

I know what you are thinking! The little voice inside you is saying, "I will become his teacher!"

No! You will not. Your role in this relationship is to be the women he wants to love and cherish forever. He does not want you to be his teacher. He does not want you to be his mother telling him what to do or how to do it!

The moral of this story is don't try to fix someone you don't admire fully for who he is! If something is wrong from the beginning, get out QUICK! The longer you stay in the relationship, the more hurtful it will be to get out.

Wouldn't you rather find yourself in the arms of Mr. Right rather than crying on the shoulder of your girlfriend after a break up? Risk it. Go out there and look for YOUR Mr. Right.

Want to know more?

Relationships: What You Already Know


I've been writing a relationship coaching/advice column since March. Now that over 200 reader questions have been asked, I wanted to share some of the common themes I've seen from Relationship Hell.

Before I do that though, I should acknowledge that it's really easy to give relationship advice a) when you have no emotional involvement in the issue and b) when you're not the one who has to act upon the advice. Despite the fact that I'm sitting in my comfy chair as I dole out opinions, feeling eternally grateful that I have the most drama-free husband in the world, I remember Relationship Hell like it was yesterday. I felt like I was always stressing over some guy who wanted too much commitment or who was afraid to commit. I'd over-analyze ambiguous comments and make myself physically sick with worry. I'd allow my mood to be influenced by his mood and base my own self-worth on others' opinions. And I remember the agony of realizing that you are more into them than they are you, or vice versa.

And I still do experience some of these things some of the time, but not like I used to. Partially because I've grown up a little since my 20s. But a lot of it is learning that my automatic reactions to events aren't necessarily true, they're just my story. I've learned that I can choose the interpretations and reactions I experience rather than just letting things happen to me, as if I was a helpless victim of the Relationship Game. Life is much more fun this way.

So here's a summary of the most common issues I've been seeing in the column. Maybe you'll find that one of these applies to your situation. Or maybe they'll all look eerily familiar as you remember them from your days in Relationship Hell.

You already know the answer

I've received questions on everything from a guy wondering if his girlfriend is a lesbian, to people wondering what to do on a good first date, to questions about whether soul mates exist. For the most part though, the people who write in with questions are worried about something; the crazy part is, they already know the answer.

If the guy you went out with two weeks ago hasn't called you back, deep down you know he isn't interested. But you may need a second opinion to help you get out of your own head. Your own "monkey mind" will take you in circles of justification and rationalization that drive you nuts, so you may want me-or anyone, for that matter-to weigh in and tell you what you already know. This is totally understandable. As obvious as the answer may be, I never think these questions are ridiculous because I really do get that our own mind can feel like the least reliable source in the world. I teach my clients ways to bypass the mind and tap into the knowing source you can trust, but those are often beyond the scope of my advice. At any rate, if she is still sleeping with her ex-boyfriend she is not a keeper. You know this. But write to me if you get confused and I'll kindly remind you.

Most of the time, you can be out of your misery if you are willing to communicate

I can't tell you how many times I've heard some variation of, "Do you think he thinks...?", or "Why would she do..."? The answer is always, "How should I know? Why don't you ask them?" Again, I get it-these aren't fun conversations to have. When you asked him if he wanted to stay over and he said no, you really want to know what he's thinking and you really, really don't want to ask him. So you ask me, as if I might know.

I don't think that every little thing in a relationship needs to be discussed. Ideally, we could all coach ourselves through the stories we're making up and we wouldn't need to have the other person explain themselves. But that isn't very realistic. Our minds don't like ambiguity and they definitely don't like gaps. So when we don't ask, we're often left filling in the blanks ourselves. And that can't be good. The truth is almost always easier to take than what we're making up.

Take it Easy-if it's this difficult, this probably just isn't the person for you

From my years in Relationship Hell, I remember that dating can really suck. When you want a committed relationship, the time and effort involved in first dates and getting to know someone new can feel torturous. But that's no reason to just "love the one you're with", especially if all the signs are telling you to run. If it's really difficult most of the time, this isn't the one for you. Relationships are not supposed to be so hard. I know we can all cite a million clichés that tell us otherwise, like "relationships are hard work". Yes, there are rough spots, but cheating, lying, verbal abuse (or worse) are not rough spots-they are signs to get the hell out. If you are 22 and your boyfriend has cheated on you for most of your relationship, he's not the one for you. If you're convinced that you need counseling after 4 months together, this may not be the one. It doesn't matter that you've met the parents or that your cat is already attached to him. Try to relax and trust that this is just practice for the good relationship that's on its way.

Dating Rules Are Meant to Be Broken


Are there rules to follow when it comes to dating? It used to be that dating tips and so-called rules were much simpler: let the guy pay for the date, no sex on the first date, and so on. These days, though, with the world -and everyone in it-becoming more and more dynamic, dating has also become more dynamic.

Should we then set boundaries when it comes to dating?

When news of a pastor who refused to marry an interrracial couple surfaced, some people were shocked and outraged. Then you also hear of news of certain religions playing matchmaker-on the day of the guy or girl's wedding! Then there's an international matchmaking, Asian dating, for one, and you wonder if long-distance relationships such as this will ever work. And then there's Demi and Ashton, who basically proved to everyone that age doesn't really matter when it comes to a love match.

The good thing about dating now is that you are free to do it as you wish. Of course, there will be some bumps along the way-like that relative who will not allow you to date outside the family's religion or nationality. But essentially, YOU are still in control-well, hopefully.

So should you follow certain dating rules these days? Like with anything, it's all a matter of preference. Do as you wish! But-again-with anything, it's best to keep an open mind to all the possibilities. Besides, with the advent of online dating services, you do have a whole treasure trove of possibilities. Online dating opens your doors to so many kinds of people, cultures, and races-with just the click of a mouse. And it's exciting!

Imagine connecting to all different kinds of people and possibly meeting your love match from the bunch. Never has it been this easy to connect-or even play matchmaker to your friends. Online dating has been around for ages for a reason: It works.

If you're someone who likes to be in control, dating these days should be according to your needs, specifications, requirements, and, yes, even your own rules. On line dating is a very viable option, but of course, you'd want the whole dating process to be smooth, easy, smart, and safe. (You'd like to open your world to people-but not the whole world!) A great on line dating service should allow you to navigate the whole on line dating process in the safest, most intelligent way. That should be the ONE RULE to strictly follow in your online dating book.

As for the other so-called dating rules-age, race, shape, height, weight, etc.-you may want to NOT deliver the final word on those. For a successful dating experience, keep an open mind. Enjoy the experience and embrace the many wonderful possibilities. And if that means having to bend the rules a bit-or completely breaking them-then so be it.

Relationships: What You Already Know


I've been writing a relationship coaching/advice column since March. Now that over 200 reader questions have been asked, I wanted to share some of the common themes I've seen from Relationship Hell.

Before I do that though, I should acknowledge that it's really easy to give relationship advice a) when you have no emotional involvement in the issue and b) when you're not the one who has to act upon the advice. Despite the fact that I'm sitting in my comfy chair as I dole out opinions, feeling eternally grateful that I have the most drama-free husband in the world, I remember Relationship Hell like it was yesterday. I felt like I was always stressing over some guy who wanted too much commitment or who was afraid to commit. I'd over-analyze ambiguous comments and make myself physically sick with worry. I'd allow my mood to be influenced by his mood and base my own self-worth on others' opinions. And I remember the agony of realizing that you are more into them than they are you, or vice versa.

And I still do experience some of these things some of the time, but not like I used to. Partially because I've grown up a little since my 20s. But a lot of it is learning that my automatic reactions to events aren't necessarily true, they're just my story. I've learned that I can choose the interpretations and reactions I experience rather than just letting things happen to me, as if I was a helpless victim of the Relationship Game. Life is much more fun this way.

So here's a summary of the most common issues I've been seeing in the column. Maybe you'll find that one of these applies to your situation. Or maybe they'll all look eerily familiar as you remember them from your days in Relationship Hell.

You already know the answer

I've received questions on everything from a guy wondering if his girlfriend is a lesbian, to people wondering what to do on a good first date, to questions about whether soul mates exist. For the most part though, the people who write in with questions are worried about something; the crazy part is, they already know the answer.

If the guy you went out with two weeks ago hasn't called you back, deep down you know he isn't interested. But you may need a second opinion to help you get out of your own head. Your own "monkey mind" will take you in circles of justification and rationalization that drive you nuts, so you may want me-or anyone, for that matter-to weigh in and tell you what you already know. This is totally understandable. As obvious as the answer may be, I never think these questions are ridiculous because I really do get that our own mind can feel like the least reliable source in the world. I teach my clients ways to bypass the mind and tap into the knowing source you can trust, but those are often beyond the scope of my advice. At any rate, if she is still sleeping with her ex-boyfriend she is not a keeper. You know this. But write to me if you get confused and I'll kindly remind you.

Most of the time, you can be out of your misery if you are willing to communicate

I can't tell you how many times I've heard some variation of, "Do you think he thinks...?", or "Why would she do..."? The answer is always, "How should I know? Why don't you ask them?" Again, I get it-these aren't fun conversations to have. When you asked him if he wanted to stay over and he said no, you really want to know what he's thinking and you really, really don't want to ask him. So you ask me, as if I might know.

I don't think that every little thing in a relationship needs to be discussed. Ideally, we could all coach ourselves through the stories we're making up and we wouldn't need to have the other person explain themselves. But that isn't very realistic. Our minds don't like ambiguity and they definitely don't like gaps. So when we don't ask, we're often left filling in the blanks ourselves. And that can't be good. The truth is almost always easier to take than what we're making up.

Take it Easy-if it's this difficult, this probably just isn't the person for you

From my years in Relationship Hell, I remember that dating can really suck. When you want a committed relationship, the time and effort involved in first dates and getting to know someone new can feel torturous. But that's no reason to just "love the one you're with", especially if all the signs are telling you to run. If it's really difficult most of the time, this isn't the one for you. Relationships are not supposed to be so hard. I know we can all cite a million clichés that tell us otherwise, like "relationships are hard work". Yes, there are rough spots, but cheating, lying, verbal abuse (or worse) are not rough spots-they are signs to get the hell out. If you are 22 and your boyfriend has cheated on you for most of your relationship, he's not the one for you. If you're convinced that you need counseling after 4 months together, this may not be the one. It doesn't matter that you've met the parents or that your cat is already attached to him. Try to relax and trust that this is just practice for the good relationship that's on its way.

Dating Rules Are Meant to Be Broken


Are there rules to follow when it comes to dating? It used to be that dating tips and so-called rules were much simpler: let the guy pay for the date, no sex on the first date, and so on. These days, though, with the world -and everyone in it-becoming more and more dynamic, dating has also become more dynamic.

Should we then set boundaries when it comes to dating?

When news of a pastor who refused to marry an interrracial couple surfaced, some people were shocked and outraged. Then you also hear of news of certain religions playing matchmaker-on the day of the guy or girl's wedding! Then there's an international matchmaking, Asian dating, for one, and you wonder if long-distance relationships such as this will ever work. And then there's Demi and Ashton, who basically proved to everyone that age doesn't really matter when it comes to a love match.

The good thing about dating now is that you are free to do it as you wish. Of course, there will be some bumps along the way-like that relative who will not allow you to date outside the family's religion or nationality. But essentially, YOU are still in control-well, hopefully.

So should you follow certain dating rules these days? Like with anything, it's all a matter of preference. Do as you wish! But-again-with anything, it's best to keep an open mind to all the possibilities. Besides, with the advent of online dating services, you do have a whole treasure trove of possibilities. Online dating opens your doors to so many kinds of people, cultures, and races-with just the click of a mouse. And it's exciting!

Imagine connecting to all different kinds of people and possibly meeting your love match from the bunch. Never has it been this easy to connect-or even play matchmaker to your friends. Online dating has been around for ages for a reason: It works.

If you're someone who likes to be in control, dating these days should be according to your needs, specifications, requirements, and, yes, even your own rules. On line dating is a very viable option, but of course, you'd want the whole dating process to be smooth, easy, smart, and safe. (You'd like to open your world to people-but not the whole world!) A great on line dating service should allow you to navigate the whole on line dating process in the safest, most intelligent way. That should be the ONE RULE to strictly follow in your online dating book.

As for the other so-called dating rules-age, race, shape, height, weight, etc.-you may want to NOT deliver the final word on those. For a successful dating experience, keep an open mind. Enjoy the experience and embrace the many wonderful possibilities. And if that means having to bend the rules a bit-or completely breaking them-then so be it.

Dating Rules Are Meant to Be Broken


Are there rules to follow when it comes to dating? It used to be that dating tips and so-called rules were much simpler: let the guy pay for the date, no sex on the first date, and so on. These days, though, with the world -and everyone in it-becoming more and more dynamic, dating has also become more dynamic.

Should we then set boundaries when it comes to dating?

When news of a pastor who refused to marry an interrracial couple surfaced, some people were shocked and outraged. Then you also hear of news of certain religions playing matchmaker-on the day of the guy or girl's wedding! Then there's an international matchmaking, Asian dating, for one, and you wonder if long-distance relationships such as this will ever work. And then there's Demi and Ashton, who basically proved to everyone that age doesn't really matter when it comes to a love match.

The good thing about dating now is that you are free to do it as you wish. Of course, there will be some bumps along the way-like that relative who will not allow you to date outside the family's religion or nationality. But essentially, YOU are still in control-well, hopefully.

So should you follow certain dating rules these days? Like with anything, it's all a matter of preference. Do as you wish! But-again-with anything, it's best to keep an open mind to all the possibilities. Besides, with the advent of online dating services, you do have a whole treasure trove of possibilities. Online dating opens your doors to so many kinds of people, cultures, and races-with just the click of a mouse. And it's exciting!

Imagine connecting to all different kinds of people and possibly meeting your love match from the bunch. Never has it been this easy to connect-or even play matchmaker to your friends. Online dating has been around for ages for a reason: It works.

If you're someone who likes to be in control, dating these days should be according to your needs, specifications, requirements, and, yes, even your own rules. On line dating is a very viable option, but of course, you'd want the whole dating process to be smooth, easy, smart, and safe. (You'd like to open your world to people-but not the whole world!) A great on line dating service should allow you to navigate the whole on line dating process in the safest, most intelligent way. That should be the ONE RULE to strictly follow in your online dating book.

As for the other so-called dating rules-age, race, shape, height, weight, etc.-you may want to NOT deliver the final word on those. For a successful dating experience, keep an open mind. Enjoy the experience and embrace the many wonderful possibilities. And if that means having to bend the rules a bit-or completely breaking them-then so be it.

Building Trust in Your Relationship - 4 Ways to Do So


Do you know how to build trust in your relationship? A lot of times, what we think will make a relationship work is not really the most important element. For example, you may think there is a need to be romantic every single day.

Well, it will be nice if you have the stamina to do so, but it is not necessary the most important element for a lasting relationship. What is more important is being predictable most of the time, which implies you are dependable. Of course, it also helps to spice up the relationship by being unpredictable once in a while.

Here are a few tips you can use to build trust in your relationship.

1) As mentioned above, predictability is important in the building of trust. Ultimately, you want a reliable partner, don't you? You do not want to keep on guessing what you partner is going to do next. It can get quite tiring.

2) Make promises and make sure you keep it, no matter how small it is. For example, if you say you are going to wash the dish, make sure you do it. If you say you are going to take out the garbage, make sure you keep your promise. If you don't keep small promises, people can't trust you to keep big promises.

3) If you want your partner to trust you, you should trust your partner too, unless you have any reasons to believe otherwise. Nothing kills a relationship more than a partner who doesn't trust you.

4) Don't keep secrets. Unless it is something that is confidential and work related, there is really nothing you shouldn't tell your partner about. Of course, there are certain things that are better left unsaid. For example, you probably don't want to tell your wife that she has a pimple on her forehead if she is absolutely fanatic about how she looks.

Become Successful in Chat Rooms


Online chat rooms have become a common means to interact with others who are looking to expand their social circles. With online chat almost anyone has the power to connect instantly with others and in real time anywhere around the world about multiple topics. Maximize your experience by following these basic rules of engagement.

* What are your options.

Thanks to social networking, online dating sites, and various other chat groups you have the benefit of selecting from thousands of sites. MSN, Yahoo and Google all provide free chat rooms so this might be a good place to start your chat experience. Singles across the world who use online dating sites are using this convenient matchmaking tool to quickly assess potential mates and are utilizing various chat room features such as general chat rooms, private chat rooms and live webcam chat.

* Check with your friends.

With chatting online now second nature for many, some of your friends are likely to be able to provide recommendations. Equally, be sure to obtain recommendations for chat sites that should be avoided.

* Narrow down your search.

You should first establish the type of chat room you are looking for. If it is your aim to meet singles in Penrith, then there is no point joining a chat service in Darwin. Look for chat services that offer many topics and themes that are applicable to your needs. With so much choice online, you have the benefit of shopping around until you find the appropriate chat website.

* Test drive some of them.

There is nothing to say that you can't try several chat services - many of them are free so there is nothing to lose by trying them out and making a short list. You will find that certain chat sites will offer topics and opportunities that suit you and you will soon find your groove.

* People watch.

Start to observe the other members by clicking through to their profiles so you can get a feel of the other people you could soon be chatting to and if their needs are similar to yours. If you are searching for Asian girls chatting online, you will be able to verify this potential by first looking through the profiles.

* Be cautious.

Chat rooms have opened up an enormous outlet for singles and attached people to communicate no matter what part of the world you live in, but with anything good, there is often a bad side. Public chat rooms can invite sleazy people right into your home who search for vulnerable online chatters. Avoid giving out sensitive information which involves your personal life. You have the right to protect your privacy so use a make up name for when you chat online, and be very selective with who you become friends with.

* Become part of the community.

Once you establish yourself in your chat room community and become one of the regulars, you will become familiar with the chat room etiquette and will have the experience to know the tell tale signs of genuine and non-genuine chatters.

Take your time when establishing your new online chat social outlet, it's a fun and exciting experience and you''ll meet many fascinating people throughout your journey.

Advice on Relationships - Simple Things You Can Do to Keep Your Woman Happy


Ever wonder why you should keep your woman happy? The answer is obvious but here is another question. It is important to keep your woman happy but do you know how to do it?

Well, this article will show you some tips on how to keep your woman happy.

First and foremost, be confident of yourself. One of the most attractive qualities to women is none other than confidence. A confident man is sexy in the eyes of women. In fact, confidence is going to play a much bigger role than looks, when it comes to attracting women.

Don't believe me? Have you even walked by a couple and wonder," How did this gorgeous babe end up with this ugly guy?" I am sure you have. The reason is because women like confidence. If you pit an ugly guy with unstoppable confidence with a handsome guy who is insecure of himself, the ugly guy is going to be the one who get the girl.

The next thing you can do to keep a woman happy is to put in more effort in doing the little things for her. Take note! I say little things. Little things like taking the garbage out of the house. Little things like washing the dish if you know she is tired. Little things like a love note that says you love her.

Some men think that they have to do big things in order to make women happy. They think they must buy a big diamond. Well, a big diamond is certainly nice if you can afford it. However, most women don't look for the big things, although it will be a nice surprise. They appreciate every small thing you do for them. It shows that you care.

Become Successful in Chat Rooms


Online chat rooms have become a common means to interact with others who are looking to expand their social circles. With online chat almost anyone has the power to connect instantly with others and in real time anywhere around the world about multiple topics. Maximize your experience by following these basic rules of engagement.

* What are your options.

Thanks to social networking, online dating sites, and various other chat groups you have the benefit of selecting from thousands of sites. MSN, Yahoo and Google all provide free chat rooms so this might be a good place to start your chat experience. Singles across the world who use online dating sites are using this convenient matchmaking tool to quickly assess potential mates and are utilizing various chat room features such as general chat rooms, private chat rooms and live webcam chat.

* Check with your friends.

With chatting online now second nature for many, some of your friends are likely to be able to provide recommendations. Equally, be sure to obtain recommendations for chat sites that should be avoided.

* Narrow down your search.

You should first establish the type of chat room you are looking for. If it is your aim to meet singles in Penrith, then there is no point joining a chat service in Darwin. Look for chat services that offer many topics and themes that are applicable to your needs. With so much choice online, you have the benefit of shopping around until you find the appropriate chat website.

* Test drive some of them.

There is nothing to say that you can't try several chat services - many of them are free so there is nothing to lose by trying them out and making a short list. You will find that certain chat sites will offer topics and opportunities that suit you and you will soon find your groove.

* People watch.

Start to observe the other members by clicking through to their profiles so you can get a feel of the other people you could soon be chatting to and if their needs are similar to yours. If you are searching for Asian girls chatting online, you will be able to verify this potential by first looking through the profiles.

* Be cautious.

Chat rooms have opened up an enormous outlet for singles and attached people to communicate no matter what part of the world you live in, but with anything good, there is often a bad side. Public chat rooms can invite sleazy people right into your home who search for vulnerable online chatters. Avoid giving out sensitive information which involves your personal life. You have the right to protect your privacy so use a make up name for when you chat online, and be very selective with who you become friends with.

* Become part of the community.

Once you establish yourself in your chat room community and become one of the regulars, you will become familiar with the chat room etiquette and will have the experience to know the tell tale signs of genuine and non-genuine chatters.

Take your time when establishing your new online chat social outlet, it's a fun and exciting experience and you''ll meet many fascinating people throughout your journey.

Getting a Girlfriend - 3 Tips


If you are looking for some tips to get a girlfriend then I think I can help you out. You see, about 2 years ago now I was at the start of university and I knew nothing about girls. It was terrible, going out and living on my own with so many people my age who knew more about getting girls than I did. I just felt left out to be honest. I knew something had to change fast, I had to learn tips to get a girlfriend. 

I started consuming  everything I could get my hands on related to dating. I read manuals written by guys, written by girls, audio-books, learned to dress well etc. And piece by piece I put it together and I think I am now in a decent enough position to help people who were where I was back then. So what are some of my tips to get a girlfriend?

Have a tidy room - This one is absolutely essential to get yourself a girlfriend. If you have a messy room you will feel self conscious about getting a girl and bringing her back there. Have a smart bachelors pad of a room. If you do not have your own place yet, get one! It is not great living under a relatives roof and is not attractive as it shows dependency.

Be prepared - Always be ready when you go out. What I mean by this is be ready to find your next girlfriend based on these tips. You must have mints at the ready, have your room set out, some ideas of a first date, where to go, have your business card ready etc. Always be ready, you never know when the perfect girl and the perfect opportunity might come up. 

Stand out - When a girl looks around a room at a party or in a club she will naturally be drawn to things that stand out, we all are. You want to make sure you stand out from other guys all the time in good ways. Be chivalrous to women when others are not, carry a business card when others just have their mobile phone. Develop a persona that people get to know you for and live up to it. It will get you lots of dates with hot girls, I promise you that. 

Advice on Relationships - Simple Things You Can Do to Keep Your Woman Happy


Ever wonder why you should keep your woman happy? The answer is obvious but here is another question. It is important to keep your woman happy but do you know how to do it?

Well, this article will show you some tips on how to keep your woman happy.

First and foremost, be confident of yourself. One of the most attractive qualities to women is none other than confidence. A confident man is sexy in the eyes of women. In fact, confidence is going to play a much bigger role than looks, when it comes to attracting women.

Don't believe me? Have you even walked by a couple and wonder," How did this gorgeous babe end up with this ugly guy?" I am sure you have. The reason is because women like confidence. If you pit an ugly guy with unstoppable confidence with a handsome guy who is insecure of himself, the ugly guy is going to be the one who get the girl.

The next thing you can do to keep a woman happy is to put in more effort in doing the little things for her. Take note! I say little things. Little things like taking the garbage out of the house. Little things like washing the dish if you know she is tired. Little things like a love note that says you love her.

Some men think that they have to do big things in order to make women happy. They think they must buy a big diamond. Well, a big diamond is certainly nice if you can afford it. However, most women don't look for the big things, although it will be a nice surprise. They appreciate every small thing you do for them. It shows that you care.

Getting a Girlfriend - 3 Tips


If you are looking for some tips to get a girlfriend then I think I can help you out. You see, about 2 years ago now I was at the start of university and I knew nothing about girls. It was terrible, going out and living on my own with so many people my age who knew more about getting girls than I did. I just felt left out to be honest. I knew something had to change fast, I had to learn tips to get a girlfriend. 

I started consuming  everything I could get my hands on related to dating. I read manuals written by guys, written by girls, audio-books, learned to dress well etc. And piece by piece I put it together and I think I am now in a decent enough position to help people who were where I was back then. So what are some of my tips to get a girlfriend?

Have a tidy room - This one is absolutely essential to get yourself a girlfriend. If you have a messy room you will feel self conscious about getting a girl and bringing her back there. Have a smart bachelors pad of a room. If you do not have your own place yet, get one! It is not great living under a relatives roof and is not attractive as it shows dependency.

Be prepared - Always be ready when you go out. What I mean by this is be ready to find your next girlfriend based on these tips. You must have mints at the ready, have your room set out, some ideas of a first date, where to go, have your business card ready etc. Always be ready, you never know when the perfect girl and the perfect opportunity might come up. 

Stand out - When a girl looks around a room at a party or in a club she will naturally be drawn to things that stand out, we all are. You want to make sure you stand out from other guys all the time in good ways. Be chivalrous to women when others are not, carry a business card when others just have their mobile phone. Develop a persona that people get to know you for and live up to it. It will get you lots of dates with hot girls, I promise you that. 

Getting a Girlfriend - 3 Tips


If you are looking for some tips to get a girlfriend then I think I can help you out. You see, about 2 years ago now I was at the start of university and I knew nothing about girls. It was terrible, going out and living on my own with so many people my age who knew more about getting girls than I did. I just felt left out to be honest. I knew something had to change fast, I had to learn tips to get a girlfriend. 

I started consuming  everything I could get my hands on related to dating. I read manuals written by guys, written by girls, audio-books, learned to dress well etc. And piece by piece I put it together and I think I am now in a decent enough position to help people who were where I was back then. So what are some of my tips to get a girlfriend?

Have a tidy room - This one is absolutely essential to get yourself a girlfriend. If you have a messy room you will feel self conscious about getting a girl and bringing her back there. Have a smart bachelors pad of a room. If you do not have your own place yet, get one! It is not great living under a relatives roof and is not attractive as it shows dependency.

Be prepared - Always be ready when you go out. What I mean by this is be ready to find your next girlfriend based on these tips. You must have mints at the ready, have your room set out, some ideas of a first date, where to go, have your business card ready etc. Always be ready, you never know when the perfect girl and the perfect opportunity might come up. 

Stand out - When a girl looks around a room at a party or in a club she will naturally be drawn to things that stand out, we all are. You want to make sure you stand out from other guys all the time in good ways. Be chivalrous to women when others are not, carry a business card when others just have their mobile phone. Develop a persona that people get to know you for and live up to it. It will get you lots of dates with hot girls, I promise you that. 

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