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среда, 25 ноября 2009 г.

How to Create an Online Dating Profile For Guys


So you have decided to jump into online dating. Or maybe you've been doing it for awhile and feel like your not having much success. Either way you need to understand HOW TO make an attractive profile that sets you apart from every other guy on online dating websites.

There is no right or wrong way of going about making profile, so use this to your advantage and make a unique or even crazy profile that makes a woman interested in meeting you.

So let's get right to it.

The First Step: Find Your Best Pictures

The first thing you need to focus on when creating an online dating profile are your PICTURES. It's not that you need to very attractive, but you need to show you care about how you look.

It is an absolute MUST that you make sure your photos are working FOR YOU and not AGAINST YOU. They should be flattering and different.

Remember that the key is to DIFFERENTIATE and SEPARATE yourself from other profiles...so your pictures are the key to making the girl even spend the time to read the rest of your profile.

At the bare minimum you need AT LEAST 10 pictures that you are clearly in. This means large group shots are out of the question. Also, pictures of your motorcycle are cool (and definitely a good way of showing a piece of who you are) but if you don't have at least 10 pictures with your face in it, she's going to think you are trying to hide something.

If you really have no idea which of your pictures are your best, then I suggest you check out the website 'hotornot' where you can post your pictures and have other people rate them. It is a good way to get feedback from other people without putting them in an awkward position of telling you that you look like an ape in your picture.

The "ABOUT ME" Section

The next piece of your profile is the nuts and bolts, the "About Me" section.

Each online dating website is set up differently but they all usually have one section that is dedicated to explaining "Who you are" and is the part where you will either turn the girl off or make her interested enough to email you.

The next 4 steps are the basic principles you need to keep in mind while creating your profile. Each dating website is different so think about these while creating your profile.

Principle 1: Instead of Selling Yourself, Show Her The Cool Parts About Your Personality

By trying to explain why you are a good match or not is showing her that you are needy. Period. Maybe you are very successful and have a lot of cars and a mansion but these things are something you'll have to share further on in the relationship.

If you are ambitious write how you really love competing in sports or how you get fulfillment out of creating a business. If you are loyal write about how much your family and friends mean to you.

What I see in a lot of guys profiles is this: "I am an ambitious guy who is confident and looking for the same in a woman."

Right. Girls read over this and click on the next profile. They have no way of knowing whether your a loser who thinks he's confident or if you are the real deal.

Principle 2: Instead of Creating Your Profile Like a Term Paper, Try Making it FUN!

One of the biggest problems I see in most guys' (and even girls') profiles is the "Im not sure what to write here" syndrome" and so they end up making a profile that looks like a to do list of "I like this" or "I don't like that".

Imagine that your profile is a blank canvas and you can do WHATEVER you want in it. You can tell your favorite stories, explain quantum science, describe your favorite recipe.....anything is better than a job resume.

So take a minute and write down 30 things you think fondly of, whether it be travel destinations or favorite food recipes (these are examples but please be more creative if you can be!) and find a way to integrate into your profile.

No matter how stupid it is doesn't really matter (seriously!) because you will be doing something different than EVERY OTHER GUY on these websites. If you can make a girl giggle while she is reading your profile because you are a star trek trekkie than you are going to find more and more women contacting you.

Principle 3: Challenge Women A Little Bit

Remember the key word we are using is "being different" and this principle is HUGE.

Now let me elaborate because this point can get taken way out of context. When I say challenge women a little bit, DO NOT insult, condescend, belittle or anything like that.

The point is every guy on these websites are just boring when it comes to presenting themselves. For women, going through guys profiles is like looking at a cookie cutter version of profiles. Put yourself out there and have fun with it.

For some examples of challenging women a little bit in your profile you could write something like this:

"Are you more than just a pretty face?"
"I love women who can hold a conversation"
"I like a beautiful woman but a woman who has her own life is even sexier"

Listen it's very subtle but show her you have your own standards and you don't just accept every girl the same. Again, the key is that it's supposed to be fun so don't make it mean or insulting.

Principle 4: Explicitly State that You Are There To Meet Friends, Maybe a Soulmate

From my experience of dating women online, I have found that many women become jaded because guys tend to get a little too serious about meeting up for the first time.

Guys offer to take them out on dates and create a dynamic between them and the women where there is pressure to create attraction. It sucks because us guys are taught that this is how we are supposed to treat women.

Scratch all that! If you want to take a woman out to dinner I think that's great. Just wait til after you know that you and her have a certain rapport.

So, in your profile, I highly suggest you state somewhere that you are on this website to find someone special, but in the meantime you are just looking to meet new people.

I also believe it shows that you aren't so desperate to meet up with the first chick that emails you that you'll run out and buy her dinner. A women loves a guy who can treat her well but doesn't want a guy who will beckon to her every need. That's just needy and that's not you!

So to wrap everything up...

The way to go about making your profile is all up to you.

I have had some success in this area and met some amazing women, many of whom are still my friends today.

The biggest piece of advice I could give is to have fun with this and really apply these principles however you wish. Just make sure your expressing yourself in your own way. Good luck and go put yourself out there!

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